Pitch Talk Thursday Presents: Chapter One-Drogba means West African Princess

Ok, it's time to make Thursdays home to not only the Big Guy, but also Pitch Talk Thursday. Here’s to starting a new tradition of the weekly roundup from the World of Futbol. I’m going to start it off by recapping the last two days of Matchday 3 in the greatest Futbol League in the world: (queue the music)The Champions!!!

(Just try to imagine Tommy Smyth narrotating this text and I understand that not everyone is going to be into this, which is why I'm trying to give a 101 to perhaps maybe spark your interest, so thanks for reading)

Matchday 3 marks the 1st half-way marker for the 1st round of the Champions League and on Tuesday we saw a couple of teams clearly separate themselves from the pack.

Group E: After pulling the shocking 2-0 victory in the opening round Lyon has put themselves 3 points over the mighty and overrated Real “Juve-West” Madrid. Tuesday saw dominate performances by both clubs in their wins over Ukrainian club Dynamo Kiev and Romanian club Steaua Bucureşti. This group is basically done at this point with the French and Spanish clubs clearly a step or too above the rest. The match to determine 2nd round placement occurs during a crucial Matchday 5 matchup at the Santiago Bernabéu Stadium in the Spanish capital.

Group F: In a group that is very near and dear to my heart with two clubs that cause a point of conflict and bring into question my dedication as a fan. I’m speaking of course about the Red Devils from Manchester and the Bhoys of Celtic from Glasgow Park. The best game of this entire group came on a Matchday 1 meeting in which Ole Gunnar the 33 year old-boy wonder from the North delivered the go ahead shortly after the break to give the Devils the three points.

Since that match, both Celtic and ManU have dominated Kobenhavn and Portuguese side Benefica. The disappointment so far in this group has been the play of Benefica who moved on to Round 2 last year after shocking the Devils at home with a draw and a W on the road. The Devils are getting healthy again and have benefited from a semi-weak group and good draws on the Matchday 3 & 4 turnaround with perhaps one of the lowest teams in Champions League in Kobenhavn, even though it feels good to say their name. Celtic have the opportunity to punch their ticket to the next round in Matchday 4 if they can find a way to get either a point or three in the land of falling Midfielders. CAUTION: PORTUGESE AHEAD!!!

Group G: This is turning out to be a very interesting group with three extremely competitive clubs in CSKA Moskva, Arsenal and FC Porto (2004 Champions League Winners). Moskva has been the surprise so far leading the group at 7 points after three matches including three points vs. the Gunners from Tuesday. I don’t know if Moskva can keep this pace up, especially with a turnaround game in Matchday 4 at Highbury, where the pitch is short and the Frenchmen run wild. My prediction is for Porto and Arsenal to prevail out of this group, but no worries Hamburg, that’s why they play the game. (Sidenote: three Portuguese teams in this years Champions League, I'm not sure this is a positive)

Group H: Not a whole lot of excitement with this group. In FIFA '06 we would have the SIM on, but here they actually have to play the game. Reported match fixers AC Milan currently lead by two points over French side Lille OSC with Belgian side Brussels (Anderlecht) and AEK Anthens pulling up the final two spots. I don’t foresee any major upsets and I hate Italian futbol so let’s just move on.

Group A: Resident Lodge Futbol commentator would have you believe this is the greatest Group of Futbol clubs ever, for the sole placement of Uber-Clubs FC Barcelona (Barca) and Super-Uber Club and Nightwatch supporters Chelski (Ze Blues), who met in a Matchday 3 battle-royal yesterday. Feeling that these two clubs will most definitely be moving on I’ll skip my commentary on German side Werder Bremen and Bulgarian club FC Levski Sofia. (Even though Bremen has the opportunity to pull ahead of Barca after after Matchday 4, that will be covered in a later post.)

Yesterdays match commentary: So I was still a little bitter from missing the 2nd half of ManU’s match vs. Kobenhavn on Tuesday due to an apparent Comcast DVR issue, still not sure what happened, but I blame 2.0 and women naturally. I knew that one DVR screw up a week is all the Futbol gods would allow, so naturally the match involving Train's team would go off without a hitch, I was correct. The game was labled as the best of the Champions League so far, well.....

Not sure I saw much of that yesterday, instead I saw a Barca side that continues to make the worst Kit decisions I’ve ever seen (honestly? I know you have a Dutch coach, but the all-Orange look takes the Dutch pride thing a little too far, and burned an image in my tele that I'm not sure I can get out). The play on the pitch wasn’t much better, with Lodge favorite and former Chelsea F now Barca F Eiður Guðjohnsen looking lost at times trying to play the middle of the pitch while 2006 World Player of the Year and #1 Athlete most commonly mistaken for a Predator, Brasilian Ronaldinho roamed down the left and right side continually making poor pass and bad touches. The other world class player Spanish MF Deco wasn’t much better, at times forcing the ball into the heart of one of the best defensive back fours there is in the game. The play of Khalid Boulahrouz on the Chelsea defence amazed just about everyone as he cloaked and frustrated the Predator all night and cemented the back right corner.

The lone goal of the match did come from 6’5” Cote d’Ivoire superstar and Train poster-boy material Didier Yves Drogba Tébily, who was born amazingly a week before me under what I’m guessing were very different circumstances. I will not take anything away from the talent that Drogba possesses, but his knack for flopping wears a little thin and makes me think he should consider applying for Portuguese citizenship. A man at 6’5” and probably 210 lbs should not flop due to a blade of grass being a different length on the pitch or a 5'7" 165lb defender missing hist leg by two feet that's all.

Chelsea got a huge three points yesterday and we will now see what the defending Champions League winners from Spain can do at home needing a full three. Perhaps we can ask Frank Rijkaard hair? (and I believe he would say start Argentinian phenom Lionel Messi and make him attack an overwhelmed Ricardo Carvalho for 90 minutes)

This post is going a little long so I’ll summarize the last Groups B, C and D by saying that Bayern Munich has been extremely dominate and in good form along with Spanish side Valencia in Group D. Valencia has the offense to carry them past weaker sides and post a huge goal differential, but it’ll be interesting to see once they face up a formidable back four what they can produce. The Red Dragons of Liverpool are even at 7 points with French club PSV for first place in Group C setting up what could be the best game of Matchday 5 on the muddy fields of Anfield on November 22nd.

Thanks for reading, for Andy Gray I’m Clive Tyldesley please join us again next time.

(Oh and I'm a Farmer not a Hunter, just so you have a little background)