Top 5 Movies: So Bad They're Good
Back in college, my roommate and I started a Bad Movie Night -- where we would invite a bunch of people over, drink & watch an absolutely terrible movie -- and do our own MST 3000 dialogue over the movie's actual dialogue. It is a ton of fun, ya'll should try is soon. Trust me, it's good times guaranteed.
Top 5 Movies: So Bad They're Good:
#5. Left Behind :: starring Kirk Cameron
After selling billions of books, Left Behind went straight to video. It was that bad. Seriously, I think even God hated this movie. Just a glorious movie to get drunk & watch. I'm not even kidding, toss back a few and drop the MST 3000 like Jayne snorting pixie-sticks before jacking off watching Serenity.
#4. The Postman :: starring Kevin Costner
Post apocalyptic mail service? Didn't Kevin Costner have email in 1997!?! A friend of mine that lives in Hollywood had a great story about Costner. Quick story... I guess he was working at a restaurant and Costner called up for a reservation, so my friend decided to act like he didn't know who Costner was. And Costner got really pissed and started naming off all of his films over the phone, still my friend didn't give in. I've always wondered if Costner getting mad sounds as fake as his real acting. Actually, now that I think about it, The Postman is just plain bad.
#3. Pootie Tang :: starring Lance Crouther
Appearances by Dave Attel, David Cross, Wanda Sykes, Chris Rock, etc. Pootie Tang, the musician/actor/folk hero of the ghetto, is chronicled from his early childhood to his battles against the Man. Need I say more? Sa da tay!
#2. Battlefield Earth :: starring John Travolta, Barry Pepper & Forrest Whitaker
The script is unbelievably terrible. I'll admit I've never read the book and have a thing against scientology after seeing TomKat go completely insane -- but Battlefield Earth is so bad it might be great. Maybe the best MST 3000 movie of all-time.
#1. Cool As Ice :: starring Vanilla Ice
It's basically a cross between Footloose, Say Anything & crack cocaine. When you have Vanilla Ice popping off lines like -- "Drop that zero and get with the hero!" -- can you go wrong? Yes, yes you can. And it's wonderfully amazing. I actually hunted for this movie throughout college before receiving a VHS copy of it as the best birthday present ever. Plus, any movie that has music videos that pass the time in the script and where Vanilla Ice rides crotch-rocket motorcycles has to be a clear #1. I recommend Cool As Ice for UTC scale's sake alone.
Top 5 Movies: So Bad They're Good:
#5. Left Behind :: starring Kirk CameronAfter selling billions of books, Left Behind went straight to video. It was that bad. Seriously, I think even God hated this movie. Just a glorious movie to get drunk & watch. I'm not even kidding, toss back a few and drop the MST 3000 like Jayne snorting pixie-sticks before jacking off watching Serenity.
#4. The Postman :: starring Kevin CostnerPost apocalyptic mail service? Didn't Kevin Costner have email in 1997!?! A friend of mine that lives in Hollywood had a great story about Costner. Quick story... I guess he was working at a restaurant and Costner called up for a reservation, so my friend decided to act like he didn't know who Costner was. And Costner got really pissed and started naming off all of his films over the phone, still my friend didn't give in. I've always wondered if Costner getting mad sounds as fake as his real acting. Actually, now that I think about it, The Postman is just plain bad.
#3. Pootie Tang :: starring Lance CroutherAppearances by Dave Attel, David Cross, Wanda Sykes, Chris Rock, etc. Pootie Tang, the musician/actor/folk hero of the ghetto, is chronicled from his early childhood to his battles against the Man. Need I say more? Sa da tay!
#2. Battlefield Earth :: starring John Travolta, Barry Pepper & Forrest WhitakerThe script is unbelievably terrible. I'll admit I've never read the book and have a thing against scientology after seeing TomKat go completely insane -- but Battlefield Earth is so bad it might be great. Maybe the best MST 3000 movie of all-time.
It's basically a cross between Footloose, Say Anything & crack cocaine. When you have Vanilla Ice popping off lines like -- "Drop that zero and get with the hero!" -- can you go wrong? Yes, yes you can. And it's wonderfully amazing. I actually hunted for this movie throughout college before receiving a VHS copy of it as the best birthday present ever. Plus, any movie that has music videos that pass the time in the script and where Vanilla Ice rides crotch-rocket motorcycles has to be a clear #1. I recommend Cool As Ice for UTC scale's sake alone.
posted by Unknown at 10:30 AM
3 Comments:
Receptionist:"Sorry Mr. Costner all of our tables are booked for tonight"
C. Davis:"Look, I really don't want to do this, but you see, I'm kind of a big deal"
Receptionist:"Yes sir, I understand that, but all of our cusotmer's are a big deal
C. Davis:"no...you see, I was in Message in a Bottle and Dragonfly"
Receptionist:(silence)
C. Davis:"For the Love of the Game?"
Receptionist:(continued silence)
C. Davis:"The War?...American Flyers"
Receptionist: "Sir, we're extremely busy tonight I must hang up now..."
C. Davis:"wait, what if I bring in my Academy Award and talk in a faux-british accent?"
Receptionist: (click)
Oy vey.
Big shock. Joe 's #1 is a Vanilla Ice Movie
Too Funny
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