Goose on the Road, Stories and thoughts from the 702

Hello my Lodge mates! Mother Goose has returned from the 702. It was eventful and profitable! I have a timeline of stories to tell. Some funny, some odd. But one thing held true from my previous post. We MUST Take the Lodge on the Road to Sin City!!!

Here is my Timeline of my Whirlwind 36 Hours in Vegas and I have included a couple of quotes from Swingers. You will see why shortly.

8am. Our Flight leave Seattle.



The Pilot gets on the loudspeaker and identifies himself as Captain Shawn Cassidy

"It says here you serve breakfast anytime?....I'll have the pankakes in the Age of Enlightenment"

I make a crack about how I guess the Hardy Boys Convention Circuit must be slow and I wonder where Parker Stevenson is. Everyone around me is 50+. No one Laughs. I miss the Lodge.

I pop in Swingers on DVD. While it may not be the #1 Vegas Movie. I think that 1st 20 minutes may be on of the best 20 minutes in any movie EVER!!!

11am. We arrive and make it to the Hotel. The Venician. I get to my room

"They're gonna give daddy the Rainman suite, you dig that? "

I dont know if its the rainman suite, but its about $250 a night and costs more than my frickin house. Its a bi-level suite. Its frickin Money Baby!!! (Side note: Im all for stickin it to the man and the corporate world, but when the man pays your ride in Vegas...Well....)

1pm-5pm
The Actual Sales conference takes place. I am bored out of my skull and since I am in the room with 1500 people. I pull up the Lodge on my Blackberry and post a message. Technology can be pretty cool.
Our Motivation Speaker is Krazy George, the man who claimed to invent the Wave. Being from Seattle I feel a liitle contempt for him due to this claim.

5-7pm. Dinner. They bring in some acts to entertain at dinner. An Elvis, Some Clowns, a woman withn a snake, and a Marilyn Monroe with Breasts so large that Train would want to wear them as a hat! I make the crack "Thats Marilyn Monroe...I don't see Jayne Mansfield, so it must be her night off" Im with a younger group so most of them get this one

8pm-9pm The Blackjack Schooling

Baby look at me, look at me. You're money, and you know what else? You're a big winner tonight.
You're a big winner. I'm gonna ask you a simple question and I want you to listen to me: who's the big winner here tonight at the casino? Huh?



You all know Mother Goose is a pretty good Blackjack player. I have taught a fair share of people how to play. We hit a table at the Venician. I dont like to play high dollar but Im with some pretty big sales guys hanging out. They put down $100 for chips I toss down my $60. 30 minutes Later Goose is up over $300!!! A sly mixing of luck, good play, timely Double Downs and a Split of a pair of 8's. I decide to give a little break before I blow my wad faster than Train over $120 and Vince Young.

9:45pm leaving the Venician heading for the Mirage.
This may be the funniest moment of the whole trip. We are walking off the Casino Floor. Two Venician Security Guards walk by. One looks like Butterbean. The other is a Midget. This is not an act, or a joke. One is a Midget. Here is what happens next (My teamamte Kevin was with me)
Goose: Looks at the Midget Walking by...Looks back again and then makes a thrid double take
Kevin: After a long long pause "You were wondering if you could take the midget werent you?"

The truth is....theat was exactly what I was thinking.

10pm. Before we leave, I hit the bar and order a Caucasian in honor of the Dude!

10:15pm Outside. The guys on the street corner handing out porn flyers. However there is a new twist. PORN TRADING CARDS!!!! I got two Porscha's a Tiffany, and 3 Lolitas. I traded the Tiffany for an Amber and was good to go. With 1 phone call, she could be in my room in 20 minutes. If Im 30 minutes away will she wait?

10:30-2am. A Virtual blur of Caucasians, Jack and Coke, Cranberry Vodka, and Gambling. I lose $50. But Still ok.

2:20. Need to soak up Alcohol. Buffalo Chicken EggRolls are underrated. Got a 6:30 am wake up cal1. Better call this a night




6:42 am The Venician show has a vertical and Horizontal Shower. This make take longer than I thought. This shower has more dials than an F-14. I felt like Khans Henchman in Star Trek II when Kirk used the Reliants Access Code to lower their shields. (Or for another, less obscure reference, I was like Crocodile Dundee learning how to use a Bidday. PS I think that is the 1st official Dual Reference in the Lodges Short history. I'll have Elias chack on that)

7:45-8am. Mmmmmm Greasy Eggs, Pork Sausage and Tabasco. The Breakfast of Hangovers.

Not much happened after that until the 4pm flight home. Couple of things happend there.



Steve Poole sits in front of me. A couple of thoughts come to mind
1) If you cant small talk the weather, what the hell do you talk to Steve Poole about?
2) Why couldnt he be Kitty Goertzen?

At this point Im tired and pretty sick of people. We land and the pilot sits right at the gate without opening the door. (Sigh. I miss Sean Cassidy)
"Ladies and Gentleman, We will be just a few minutes here, we are training a new employee to drive the gate mechanism up to the plan."

Im ok with this. Gotta learn sometime. The lady behind my snidely says, "Geez havnt they made us wait long enough." Goose then snaps. Lack of Sleep. BAC still slightly under the legal limit. "I for one would like for him to learn how to do it right, but since you want to rush him why dont you get off 1st"

Laughter. Good times.

A short drive home, A little time with the Gander and Gosslings. 8 very solid hours of Sleep, and then onto the blog for a posting

I have some commentary on the posts over the last two days to be shared later. Let me be the last one to welcome Shawn (Can we give him the Nickname Shawon after Shawon Dunston?)

Goose