Top 10 Things I learned in Vegas
1. If that really cute girl that’s flirting with you mentions she works for “a service”, it means she’s a hooker.
2. Star Wars slot machines = happiness
3. The Elderly are extremely gullible.
Story: I’m on the monorail, headed
down to the MGM to meet some friends. Across from me are two old ladies talking about “New York, New York” and how cool it is because it looks like a bunch of skyscrapers in the city.I’ll admit...I’m a little drunk at this point, so I say:
“Were you guys here when they tore down the Twin Towers portion of the hotel?”
“Good heavens! Did they really!?!”
“Yeah, they thought it was in bad taste to have the twin towers there so they blew it up.”
“They blew it up?!?!”
“Yeah...it was pretty crazy. They brought them down one tower at a time. It was pretty creepy.”
“Well, that’s just not right. I can’t believe they’d do that! We’re never going there again!”
4. Getting really, really, really, really, really trashed and then going for $5.99 Prime Rib at 4 AM is not a good idea. You may find yourself calling everyone there your “Hombre” (I really wish I could say that didn’t happen).
5. The concept of a giant slurpee-like drink made with Everclear and put into a football shaped container may sound cool, as does ordering the extra shot for $1. But unless you like the taste of your esophagus burning away like it’s been hit with Alien acid-blood, you may want to stay away.
6. Drinking a Borgsphere causes everything to turn green. EVERYTHING.
7. The most brilliant breakfast idea ever: Take a baked potato & split it in half. Put scrambled eggs on top. Then cover it all with Nacho cheese.
8. If you go to eat at the “Pink Taco”, just be aware that there is not a single joke you could possibly make that the wait staff has not heard 100 times before.
9. Vegas has one of the coolest Punk Rock bars this side of CBGB. The place also gets props for having the single most epic juke box I have ever seen. Here is where I was introduced to their speciatly shot known as "Ass Juice". Now...I don't know what's in it. And quite frankly, I don't want to know. But damn, if doesn't get you drunk in a hurry.
10. Losing 22 hands of Black Jack in a row is kinda like having Josh Brown kick you in the nuts 22 times.
posted by Casey at 9:25 PM
15 Comments:
I will give it to the man. When he goes to Vegas he parties hard and isn't afraid to pay for t!t!! Unlike some Lodge members.
you had me at the New York, New York story...classic...you should write their PR department...
this guy... this guy right here... this guy is excused from lack of posting for sheer extra-curricular points.
Thats what im F'n talkin about. Bringin it Vegas style.
MCP. As much as I disagree with you 90% of the time. You do go 110%
Doing Vegas "Geek Style"
One of these days I'll do a post about the story of my first trip to Vegas in 2005. It's truly an EPIC story, and could have only happened in Vegas.
The only problem is that I have to figure out how to write it in a "work appropriate" manor.
Well, we'll see that in 3 years (since your ComiCon post is coming up on a year pretty soon).
And 22 hands!?! MCP, you need to take the Goose Blackjack 101 Course in a hurry.
I'm actually not a bad Blackjack player, it was just a freak 22 hands.
I doubled down on 11 4 times during that run, and I never got better than a 4! How does that happen? Top that off with the dealer getting 3 blackjacks in a row, and it was like the gambling gods were against me. I couldn't be too annoyed though, as all the money I lost were just my winnings from hitting the Jackpot on the Wheel of Fortun super-slot machine thingie.
As for the '05 Vegas post...I just don't know how to write it up, as it involves some stuff that could pretty much ruin my political career.
There are times when you do not double down...even on an 11.
There will be a blackjack 101 and 102 course taught again before the Mythical Lodge Trip to Vegas
Oh, nice!
Count me in for the mythical Lodge trip to Vegas!
I know you don't always Double down on an 11, here's what the dealer was showing each of those times:
1. 5
2. 10
3. 4
4. 7
The only one you could even question is the 10 (the dealer had 20). Other than that...if the dealer is showing a 5, then you're just on crack if you're not doubling down.
Thats correct. But you also have to look at the track record of the dealer, Count how many face cards have been played. How many hands you have lost over the last 10
Also realize that Dealer Stands on a soft 17 (Eliminating the play on the 7)
It also depends where you are situated at the table. Will your double down card bust the dealer if you are in the hot seat?
You did pretty well. I wouldnt have smacked you for playing poorly. (Like I did with Joe when he made bonehead moves....but he learned and began to do well)
Im getting the itch boys....Bright Lights, Casinos, Lodge road Trip.
Wait, Never mind. We dont commit to anything so why bring it up. Vegas will never happen.
It was a painful 22 hands...thank god for the cocktail waitress who kept those Bloody Mary's flowing @ an exceptionally speedy rate.
This is why I do not play blackjack because it is the moneysucker of all games. I wasted a good 2 years burning paychecks trying to get aces & faces. As a former heavy gambling person please allow me to enlighten you onto Baccarat and Pai Gow Poker. The two most stable and near-profitable card games at a casino. If you're hurting for money from blackjack really bad, go play craps instead.
Post a Comment
<< Home